“Your greatest awakening comes when you are aware about your infinite nature.” ― Amit Ray
Lately I’ve been thinking about my old perceptions of what “being enlightened” meant. I used to think enlightenment was something a very few could understand. Enlightenment seemed like a far-fetched state of being that only people like Mother Teresa, Ghandi, or Buddha could achieve- not me.
Those are extreme examples, of course. I knew there had to be a happy medium between those great leaders and, well, the rest of us. Truth be told, I didn’t realize how subtle a “spiritual awakening” could be… especially at the beginning. It doesn’t begin with a flash or light or angel sighting, but there were endless signs. As I reflect on the past several years of my life, I can’t help but notice unbelievable patterns, synchronicities, and small miracles. Although I’ve noticed these “meaningful coincidences” for as long as I can remember, they have gotten much more intense over time.
These were my first signs of my awakening, but I wasn’t quite ready to acknowledge it.
I had a feeling that these signs were special, but I pushed them aside for several years- until last fall, right before I moved to Boston. That’s when my true spiritual awakening began- when I was willing and ready to open my eyes to something greater. In the past I was scared of my own power and of my higher self; today, it’s the most comforting aspect of my life.
It all started in 2010 with the doppelgängers. Some of you may remember the Facebook trend where we were prompted to change our profile pictures to a celebrity look-alike (I was called Veronica Mars for years, so I chose Kristen Bell). Ironically, a couple of weeks later I started noticing lookalikes everywhere. Some of my friends probably remember me creepily sending them pictures of people I met who I thought looked like them (and yes, I still do that). I truly have no shame when I come across sychronicities, although I’ve finally learned to keep my mouth shut and only share these moments with people I know understand. 🤣
In addition to the doppelgängers, I noticed name patterns, friends with the same birthdays, and even similar phone numbers or addresses. For a while I found playing cards with 2 of Hearts everywhere, too. It got creepy after a while.
For many years I numbed what seemed to be a third eye opening, but I still couldn’t escape the synchronicities. In 2010 I also started to blog while living in San Francisco. I had a job as an office manager at a tech office, where I spent most of my time working on my website, lining up event gigs, coming up with business ideas, and writing a lot of Yelp reviews. Although I got a Bachelor’s Degree in Entrepreneurship, for the first time, I realized I was meant to be an entrepreneur. Working for people didn’t seem to suit me, and I wasn’t the best employee, either. My mind was in the clouds and all I could think about were my own dreams, my own writing, my own little world. That was my first sign that I was meant for something different- I ended up quitting that job, attempted to blog and do event work full time, but I fell on my face (literally) before realizing I needed to actually get another “real” job. I wasn’t mature enough to handle adult responsibilities or time management on my own. At that point, I still had lessons to learn. I wasn’t ready to fully awaken.
Throughout the next seven years I continued to go through the same patterns, always keeping my own marketing business (I registered a DBA in January 2010) at the top of my resume. After all, that was my true “work;” not pushing papers in an office or making sales calls for someone else’s company. Despite taking on jobs to pay my bills, I always would go back to my own writing, picked up freelance clients, began another blog about fashion, and attempted to use my talents however I could at work. I recently wrote about how being money-focused in the workplace was out of alignment with my soul; if my work doesn’t feel purposeful, then I don’t want to do it. Thankfully, teaching part-time has been perfect for me to live in alignment, have the ability to work on my writing, and become closer to my spiritual self. There’s no one closer to consciousness than young children- they’re fascinating and have been instrumental in my spiritual path.
I will never be the type of person who jumps up and down declaring how happy I am, or pretend life doesn’t have its share of problems. Being “enlightened” doesn’t mean I’m all smiles and rainbows. I’ll always be a realist, but I have made the conscious decision to focus on the positive aspects of life here on earth, as I know there is something much bigger taking care of me. My spirituality isn’t the same as anyone else’s, and yours won’t be, either. Whether it’s connecting with nature, a daily ritual, religion, or other groups, remember that there is no wrong way to spiritually connect. It’s what your heart tells you and what feeds your soul.
The best I can do is share my own experiences with others, and hopefully it will help guide someone along their own path. I hope to give someone the strength to believe in their intuition, even if it takes years to finally listen to the signs.