One of the biggest hurdles I have been trying to tackle these past few months is being okay exactly where I am at in life. Every day is a new opportunity to be the best person I can be, despite the challenges life throws my way.
I am starting a new part time job soon and focusing on my writing and freelance work; instead of trying to replicate the lives of my friends or the expectations society has put on me, I’m learning to follow my heart and do what my gut tells me is right. I’ve always beaten to my own drum, and that’s okay. The definition of insanity is “doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result,” so it boggles my mind that I have continued to try 9-5 jobs this past decade with little success. I easily grow bored, which is why I started a marketing freelance company with a friend back in San Francisco nine years ago.
My primary focus this next year is to exercise the skills I have learned; living one day at a time, being rigorously honest and facing life instead of running away or changing it. I have developed better distress tolerance skills thanks to DBT and my mindfulness practice, in addition to a deep spiritual connection. I’ve been enjoying the simple things in life; photography, writing, strolls through Cambridge and lunch with friends. Each morning I wake up and journal on the porch with my coffee, appreciating nature and the life that is all around me.
A mentor of mine keeps telling me to “stay in the boat.” I love this analogy (especially since I’m so passionate about water). It’s so easy to look ahead, make plans and predict the future. I’ve been doing so much better at accepting life as is comes and focusing on the moment.
I’ve been trying to turn my anxiety into adventure, live beautifully day by day and view the challenges as learning experiences. Here in Boston, I am learning to “stay in the boat” and take life as it comes instead of trying to change things. The grass isn’t always greener on the other side; it’s perfectly green just as it is. As long as I keep my side of the street clean and continue to grow, the right opportunities and people will come into my life. I just have to continue to keep the faith and accept myself- just as I am.