Month: July 2017

Living Beautifully

 

I used to get tied up in day to day monotony and focused on all of the things I “had” to do or “should” do.  This was especially prevalent in New York.  I didn’t always stop to enjoy the beauty around me or the small details that bring each day joy.

My life was so chaotic that I didn’t enjoy the little things, such as sitting to enjoy a smoothie at Starbucks, journaling, listening to the birds, painting my nails to coordinate with my outfit, or taking pictures of the sunrise.  I just rushed through life to get to the next moment.  That’s no way to live.

After leaving NYC last summer, I lived with family by the lake in a small Michigan town, away from the modern conveniences of city living.  It was the perfect “reset.”  I enjoyed coffee in the backyard each morning, relaxed by the water, and actually enjoyed my meals- I stopped rushing and began to enjoy the moment.

That was when my true passion for mindfulness began.

When I started this blog in the beginning of December 2016, I wanted to combine my mindfulness lessons with my love for style and living beautifully.  People have continually told me to relax and stop worrying about my makeup, outfit or hair- but those are things I enjoy.  It’s a part of “living beautifully.”

I believe there’s a fine balance between relaxing and simply feeling good for you.  Some days I want to run around in a baseball cap and flip flops, and others I want to wear my staple- the little black dress.  It all depends on the day.

Living beautifully is about balance.

Life in Boston has provided a perfect mix of city life and mindful living, as this historic city is so diverse with beauty, culture, nature and sophistication.  Mindful in Style came naturally to me after just six short days, and I’ve enjoyed writing about my life of mindfulness, minimalism, style and spirituality ever since.

What does living beautifully mean to you?

Keep Doing You

Lately I have been seeing a lot of propaganda online about what is on trend, what not to wear and worse, what men want you to do and how they want you to look.  From how to act to what to shave, I have begun holding silly resentments at those articles and the people who wrote them.  At the risk of sounded bitter or jaded, I’ve got to say- who cares “what men want?”

I would rather be alone forever than change for someone else.

This is probably why I have been single for nearly three years; I am quite stubborn and fiercely independent.  I’ll run away when things don’t work out instead of staying in an unhappy relationship.  Appropriately, my editor at Thought Catalog wrote this article that popped up in my Facebook feed, which couldn’t be more perfect for today’s sentiments.

I have dabbled with dating apps while living in Boston, only to have a few dry conversations and less-than-stellar dates.  Nothing has stuck… not even a good laugh or a friendship.  It’s always the same thing- “how do you like Boston?” “What do you do for work?” “You seem to move a lot.” “Do you ever take off your sunglasses?”

Stop.  Better yet, I need to stop.

I’ve felt judged and belittled, which is all on me.  This certainly isn’t a period of my life where my stress level can tolerate dating, what others think of me or the “big picture.”  I need to focus on myself and the now.

I’ve repeatedly thought, “maybe this time will be different,” hoping to find a diamond in the rough.  Dating used to come naturally for me, but at 30-something I continually find disappointment.  It’s just not time yet.  I’ve run back to unhealthy past relationships because I know what I’m going to get, which just fuels the insanity.

After talking with a good friend on Sunday about our shenanigans, we came to the conclusion that we both just need to focus on ourselves.  Old traumas are brought to the forefront when I meet people who try and change me for their own fancy, something I didn’t really acknowledge until this past spring.  While it would be nice to have a buddy to do things with, explore the east coast, drink coffee with in the morning and talk to at night, I have plenty on my plate to keep my life full.

Until the day I do meet my best friend who compliments my life, not try to change it, I’ll continue to focus on myself, my career, my friendships, and my oversized sunglasses.

Roll the Dice

It’s hard to believe I left NYC one year ago today.  I remember that morning well- I was half packed, nervous and defeated.  I had been staying at a friend’s house with air conditioning because my tiny bedroom was full of boxes, humid and cramped.  I needed to be around other people to keep my mind off the decision I had made- to trade in my dreams of the New York hustle to create a more mellow, mindful life.

Although it wasn’t easy, it was one of the best decisions I could have made.  You can’t fit a square peg in a round hole, and I didn’t like the person I was becoming.  I had become cold and bitter, even when my work life was going well.  I vividly remember a hot afternoon walking down Fifth Avenue, pushing through people while trying to deposit a very nice paycheck into my bank account.  Money didn’t make me happy, nor did my surroundings.

I wanted peace.

Although I was able to find serenity in Central Park, along the Hudson River and at the New York Public Library, I stopped enjoying life day to day.  I figuratively “rolled the dice” and made the decision to leave.  It has been an interesting ride ever since that day in late July, and this morning I have been reflecting on how grateful I am and how far I have come.

I’ve never been nervous to make big decisions, but over the past year I have learned to focus on the moment and take life step by step.  Over the years I have continually looked at the “bigger picture,” not realizing that the simple choices I make in my day to day life can lead up to amazing things that I never would have pondered.  

My decision to move to Boston was one of the best I ever could have made.  It is the perfect balance between city life and mindful living; being along the ocean, the Charles River and lakes has brought me peace, while the opportunities I’ve been given have helped me practice living in the moment.

I’m still learning to slow down, focus on what I want, and let the universe do the rest.  If I am able to live in the moment, the fruits of my labor will be revealed in ways I couldn’t even imagine in my own mind- and I’m grateful to be present to notice them. 

Although I still hold New York near and dear to my heart, bigger, better, and faster isn’t something I need to implement in my daily life.  With a grateful heart, I’ll focus on the day, do the best I can and continue to live in the moment.  You never know when you’ll get lucky and roll a Yahtzee!